Good morning to all,
Now seems like the appropriate time to write about releasing our loved ones that have transitioned, back to spirit. I have gone to many memorials in the last few years, so the topic seems to keep coming up. My first and most horrific introduction into losing a loved one, was when my dear uncle Maury died of cancer at the age of 36 and I was 23. I had lost a grandfather and many pets, but never anyone I was so completely attached to. He was the love of my life often making me laugh until I cried. Weeks before the family even knew he was sick, we were talking on the phone and I said to him "Maury, please don't die, because if you die I'm going to die too." His response was "don't worry honey, I'm fine. I love you." Somehow, despite our (7) hour distance apart I knew inside, he wasn't fine. Sure enough, a few weeks later, I got a call from the family, that Maury was at Monterey Peninsula Hospital having stomach surgery. Despite my aunt's words, not to worry and that I didn't have to come down, I heard a voice in my head yell "get to him NOW." Needless to say, I drove like a banshee, turning a 7 hour drive into 5 1/2 hours and I was the last one to hear his words "I love you honey over and over" in ICU.
The devastation of losing him was unbearable. I cried and cried night after night at the loss. Then he began appearing in my dreams. My uncle Maury suddenly appeared looking strong and healthy with a beautiful light glowing from behind him. The moment I saw him I would begin to cry again. He looked at me with a kind smile on his face and said "honey, I can still see you and hear you. You just need to talk to me." With that, I'd cry "please Maury don't leave me again" and then I'd wake up.
This occurred night after night, month after month, and finally at the year end mark, he appeared once again with a beaming light behind him. He looked at me ever so lovingly and said "honey, it's time for me to go now. I need to say good-bye to you, my sister and my mother. I love you." With that he turned into the light for the last time. The VERY next day I met my future husband that had strangely similar hobbies as Maury such as: collecting comic books, tools and unfortunately smoking pot. Within a few short years I gave birth a second time to my awesome son named of course "Maury."
Many old cultures believed families and friends of the deceased were allowed to grieve one full year, but after that you were no longer supposed "to call back" the dead with thoughts or emotions of the deceased, because every time you do, you pull them back from moving on in spirit - into the Light. I can not agree more! (Notice especially with photographs how they really pull you back to a place of grief keeping you from living in the "now" and keeping them from transitioning in Spirit.) I am convinced this is why there are so many ghosts and spirits inhabiting this earth and in so many different locations-trapped here. We have become a society that is unwilling to set our loved ones free, mistaking doing so with forgetting about them which is truly a very selfish act. If we really love a person, don't we want the best for them (and not ourselves) in this life and the next? It's important for us to learn to say I love you always and to set our loved ones free, so they can continue on with their spiritual growing. Always have faith you will see each other again someday. (Truthfully, they will probably incarnate into a future relative or friend of yours, so PAY attention to those around you. It's like I tell my kids, "If I am gone and you have children, you BETTER be awesome parents, because the chances are one of your kids will probably BE ME!"
Namaste
Monday, June 27, 2011
When you Live Your truth, You Can See the Truth
"When you live your truth, you can see the truth."
My friend Catherine, made this comment to me on the phone last night when I asked her "Cath, how is it you and I can see how totally out of balance the world is, being completely disconnected from the earth but it seems most others don't ?" And this was her reply...... Toooshayyy.
My friend Catherine, made this comment to me on the phone last night when I asked her "Cath, how is it you and I can see how totally out of balance the world is, being completely disconnected from the earth but it seems most others don't ?" And this was her reply...... Toooshayyy.
Saturday, June 25, 2011
Follow Up to Yesterday's Post and Personal Example of What I Meant
Good morning everyone,
Happy Sunny Saturday Everyone! I received an email this morning from a very dear woman kindly suggesting I should leave out a paragraph from yesterday's post ("Imagine how I feel, having the memories and visions of my past life as a male warrior known for his honesty and courage, now living in a world with little integrity, next to nil honesty and almost zero sacrifice in a white ladies body?") due to its non-spiritual view. After thinking about it, I do agree with her, it is a non-spiritual viewpoint, but one that is still very true to me none the less. After my 48 years on this planet and experiencing many different types of jobs and locations, I have come to see that honesty, integrity and sacrifice don't go well in a capitalistic society where acquiring more is the driving force at any cost, whether.the human spirit, the environment and even our children. I have been punished many times over for exhibiting these behaviors on the job and in my life (paying a financial toll & wearing my spirit thin) but as hard as it is I can not compromise these values, because I have learned - time in spirit is a lot longer than time on this earth and I want to be proud of the decisions I made this time around! I don't ever want to say "if only." (And even more truthfully, I don't want to have to incarnate again unless we're back to living in a hunter/gatherer society. Our society now is totally foreign to me and one I don't belong to not understanding how it got to this place of unimaginable disconnection to the earth. I totally "get" the horrible experience the Native Americans lived through going from a wild and free culture to one that was controlled by religion and greed destroying everything they were. I feel the same way again here and now. Strange, how I incarnated at these (2) pivotal times on our earth.)
My soul isn't up for compromise because I'd like to enter Spirit at a high frequency, to a place where I can be at peace. I would like to avoid entering the other world in the cold, damp place I experienced as Hell, screaming voices and all, souls trapped by the choices made in their life times.
For me, being spiritual is about sacrifice and connections to the earth, humanity and our children. It is having faith in the Creator to do the right thing in all areas of our lives. It seems that in today's world, everyone thinks "they deserve it all" - most unwilling to sacrifice (lavish lifestyles, technological gadgets, jobs, fancy homes and cars) in order to preserve the environment or be around to raise their children or stand up for a cause that betters humanity or the environment. People have become slaves to their possessions, to the point no one wants to stand up and say or do the right thing at their jobs or to their bosses for fear of losing those possessions, which unknowingly allows evil to reign. I think it is also accounts for why so many suffer alcohol and drug problems, because they have given up the control in their lives to others and things or simply by not having a connection to a Power higher than themselves. Today's world is more preoccupied with self grandiose and self importance than the natural world. Many people grossly mistake self - importance with STUFF-(money, big paying jobs, fancy cars, lavish vacations, kids school's & colleges, all exterior stuff.) (Please know, this does not pertain to those of you that live simply and have seen through the facade making choices benefiting the family & home.) Now, even women (with a husband in a job, not single parents) are not willing to compromise jobs, big houses and prestige in order to stay home and raise their own children. Most women place their children (which should be their most cherished job of all) in the care of strangers and wonder then why the children are victimized or grow up with substance abuse or emotional problems by age 12! Where are the grandmother's to help? Many, such as my mom don't even know what it is to sacrifice their wants and needs to help raise the grandchildren, often living far away with little contact. Women don't know how to be women and mother's anymore, because their jobs away are more important, as is their wants and needs. Children are a gift from GOD, and all sacrifices should be made to raise that child with a deep love & connection and let the husband be the provider. That's what they were intended to be all along. Now, we've even taken that away from them, compromising a man's integrity wondering, why men are broken as well. We, as women, are the givers of life, the foundations for the families. When woman don't even know how to breastfeed their own babies anymore or want to be home with their gifts from God, because they don't know what to do with them or may experience isolation or loneliness, you know we've gone 180 degrees off the Way.Where is the sacrifice for the good of the children or the family or the community, i.e. tribe any more? For most: GONE.
On a lighter note, to reference the part about coming back as a black person, ("if you hated blacks in your past life......"), I have a perfect example of that coming from right here from home. I should have included it in yesterday's post. In 2005, I began dreaming over and over about a southern plantation in Kentucky, that had an elderly couple that owned it. The man in my dream/vision was very kind to his slaves, which shocked the slaves and the other whites in my dream, but his wife named "Mary" was very bigoted and felt that the blacks were below her. She was very warm and kind to other whites, but the blacks definitely had their place far below. Night after night, I kept returning to this plantation, which I realized was still inhabited by the souls of soldiers that needed to be released. But one night in my dream, they had a party, with friends, family and very ragged looking soldiers , and a table full of slaves. The white male who was the owner of this plantation, got up from the table with the other white owners and went and sat with the slaves. Everyone was shocked (including the slaves) but the white male really respected them as people. Mary, was not happy to say the least.
The VERY next day after this dream, I was sitting in the employee lunchroom at the Sheraton in Steamboat where I used to work. Our Jamaican staff would sit at the table in the far back and the white management group would usually sit in the first table nearest the door. (note-I usually sat with the Jamaicans but not this day) Wellll, this one particularly fine looking black Jamaican male I had a crush on but did not know, got up from his table and came & sat down next to me at the white table. His mannerisms instantly caught my attention because I instantly recognized them as Mary's.. To say I was shocked is an understatement. Needless to say, that day I spoke with Dane, was the day my dreams ended and I knew I had seen his past life as a bigoted old white woman. Dane is now my husband of five years, and sure enough Dane was born in the poorest place in Kingston, Jamaica literally living in a ghetto. When he took me back to Jamaica, I was shocked to see the opposite life style he lived as Mary, now learning karma's lesson as Dane. He had to be re-born into the situation he helped create as Mary.. A balancing of the souls!
Happy Sunny Saturday Everyone! I received an email this morning from a very dear woman kindly suggesting I should leave out a paragraph from yesterday's post ("Imagine how I feel, having the memories and visions of my past life as a male warrior known for his honesty and courage, now living in a world with little integrity, next to nil honesty and almost zero sacrifice in a white ladies body?") due to its non-spiritual view. After thinking about it, I do agree with her, it is a non-spiritual viewpoint, but one that is still very true to me none the less. After my 48 years on this planet and experiencing many different types of jobs and locations, I have come to see that honesty, integrity and sacrifice don't go well in a capitalistic society where acquiring more is the driving force at any cost, whether.the human spirit, the environment and even our children. I have been punished many times over for exhibiting these behaviors on the job and in my life (paying a financial toll & wearing my spirit thin) but as hard as it is I can not compromise these values, because I have learned - time in spirit is a lot longer than time on this earth and I want to be proud of the decisions I made this time around! I don't ever want to say "if only." (And even more truthfully, I don't want to have to incarnate again unless we're back to living in a hunter/gatherer society. Our society now is totally foreign to me and one I don't belong to not understanding how it got to this place of unimaginable disconnection to the earth. I totally "get" the horrible experience the Native Americans lived through going from a wild and free culture to one that was controlled by religion and greed destroying everything they were. I feel the same way again here and now. Strange, how I incarnated at these (2) pivotal times on our earth.)
My soul isn't up for compromise because I'd like to enter Spirit at a high frequency, to a place where I can be at peace. I would like to avoid entering the other world in the cold, damp place I experienced as Hell, screaming voices and all, souls trapped by the choices made in their life times.
For me, being spiritual is about sacrifice and connections to the earth, humanity and our children. It is having faith in the Creator to do the right thing in all areas of our lives. It seems that in today's world, everyone thinks "they deserve it all" - most unwilling to sacrifice (lavish lifestyles, technological gadgets, jobs, fancy homes and cars) in order to preserve the environment or be around to raise their children or stand up for a cause that betters humanity or the environment. People have become slaves to their possessions, to the point no one wants to stand up and say or do the right thing at their jobs or to their bosses for fear of losing those possessions, which unknowingly allows evil to reign. I think it is also accounts for why so many suffer alcohol and drug problems, because they have given up the control in their lives to others and things or simply by not having a connection to a Power higher than themselves. Today's world is more preoccupied with self grandiose and self importance than the natural world. Many people grossly mistake self - importance with STUFF-(money, big paying jobs, fancy cars, lavish vacations, kids school's & colleges, all exterior stuff.) (Please know, this does not pertain to those of you that live simply and have seen through the facade making choices benefiting the family & home.) Now, even women (with a husband in a job, not single parents) are not willing to compromise jobs, big houses and prestige in order to stay home and raise their own children. Most women place their children (which should be their most cherished job of all) in the care of strangers and wonder then why the children are victimized or grow up with substance abuse or emotional problems by age 12! Where are the grandmother's to help? Many, such as my mom don't even know what it is to sacrifice their wants and needs to help raise the grandchildren, often living far away with little contact. Women don't know how to be women and mother's anymore, because their jobs away are more important, as is their wants and needs. Children are a gift from GOD, and all sacrifices should be made to raise that child with a deep love & connection and let the husband be the provider. That's what they were intended to be all along. Now, we've even taken that away from them, compromising a man's integrity wondering, why men are broken as well. We, as women, are the givers of life, the foundations for the families. When woman don't even know how to breastfeed their own babies anymore or want to be home with their gifts from God, because they don't know what to do with them or may experience isolation or loneliness, you know we've gone 180 degrees off the Way.Where is the sacrifice for the good of the children or the family or the community, i.e. tribe any more? For most: GONE.
On a lighter note, to reference the part about coming back as a black person, ("if you hated blacks in your past life......"), I have a perfect example of that coming from right here from home. I should have included it in yesterday's post. In 2005, I began dreaming over and over about a southern plantation in Kentucky, that had an elderly couple that owned it. The man in my dream/vision was very kind to his slaves, which shocked the slaves and the other whites in my dream, but his wife named "Mary" was very bigoted and felt that the blacks were below her. She was very warm and kind to other whites, but the blacks definitely had their place far below. Night after night, I kept returning to this plantation, which I realized was still inhabited by the souls of soldiers that needed to be released. But one night in my dream, they had a party, with friends, family and very ragged looking soldiers , and a table full of slaves. The white male who was the owner of this plantation, got up from the table with the other white owners and went and sat with the slaves. Everyone was shocked (including the slaves) but the white male really respected them as people. Mary, was not happy to say the least.
The VERY next day after this dream, I was sitting in the employee lunchroom at the Sheraton in Steamboat where I used to work. Our Jamaican staff would sit at the table in the far back and the white management group would usually sit in the first table nearest the door. (note-I usually sat with the Jamaicans but not this day) Wellll, this one particularly fine looking black Jamaican male I had a crush on but did not know, got up from his table and came & sat down next to me at the white table. His mannerisms instantly caught my attention because I instantly recognized them as Mary's.. To say I was shocked is an understatement. Needless to say, that day I spoke with Dane, was the day my dreams ended and I knew I had seen his past life as a bigoted old white woman. Dane is now my husband of five years, and sure enough Dane was born in the poorest place in Kingston, Jamaica literally living in a ghetto. When he took me back to Jamaica, I was shocked to see the opposite life style he lived as Mary, now learning karma's lesson as Dane. He had to be re-born into the situation he helped create as Mary.. A balancing of the souls!
Friday, June 24, 2011
Making Peace With the Things You Hate the Most................................
I woke up this morning thinking it might be a good idea to address a tiny bit about Karma, reincarnation and basically facing issues you hate the most in an attempt to explain how I went from being a male Lakota warrior in the last life time, to now being a white female. It's rather simple really. I was reborn into the race I absolutely hated with a fury the last time around, into a sex, I had deemed as weaker than me as Gall. My hate for the white race was so strong that the emotions literally went through time and space with me, that as a teen while attending North Hollywood High School, I'd sit in the quad at lunchtime trying to figure out how I could be so ashamed to be white and figure out why I hated absolutely everything in our society. I HATED our fancy house, the fancy cars and the attitude of most of the rich kids I went to school with. Often, I'd just sit next to a tree at school and think about when I was young growing up in Colorado, when I had my horse Cherokee, was in the mountains all winter skiing, or at the lake every weekend in the summers. I just wanted to be back in nature and was miserable living in a cement city with mostly artificial people. (Not all!)
As the years went by and the lessons and dreams unfolded, I was taught a few lessons about Karma. (in other words cause and effect). In order to grow spiritually, one must let go of hate, and learn to love all things and all races equally. More importantly, in order to learn the consequences of your actions in one life time, you will be reborn your next life living in the situation you created for others. How can you understand how your actions have affected others if you don't have to walk in those shoes? An easy example: if you hated blacks your last life time & treated them as inferior, you are sure to be re-born as a black person this life time living in tough conditions, so you can experience (learn at a soul level) how your actions and emotions created the situation you are in. A balancing of the soul so to speak. People may not like reading this, but truth isn't always easy or kind. Imagine how I feel, having the memories and visions of my past life as a male warrior known for his honesty and courage, now living in a world with little integrity, next to nil honesty and almost zero sacrifice in a white ladies body? I was filled with self hate for my skin color until I went up to Standing Rock Indian Reservation in 1996, and stood on Chief Gall's grave feeling self pity of my now current situation. The rain began pouring down on me with lightening and thunder crashing down all around me. Suddenly, I "heard" an amazing insight. With my arms in the air praying to the directions I heard these words "How can you mourn for here you are dancing on your own grave. You are still the same person, with lighter skin, that is all!" With those words, I looked down at my arms and started to laugh realizing very little really has changed with me except for the outer shell, even then I am still very strong and tough regardless. My self pity instantly turned into a smile and with that I was able to return home as proud as can be. The God's are right!
As to my red hair, I've always hated since I was a child, my wise daughter Tessa reminded me, " mom, you were reborn with red hair as a reminder to continue walking the good red road, even in this lifetime," which I have despite how tough it really has been. Bless her heart for the comforting words.
Remember: Walk in Balance (in all aspects of your life) and feel with your soul, not your eyes.
(note: to be a warrior in any life time, one must have a deep sense of right and wrong, a very strong spine and faith and courage in the Creator to speak the words most don't like to hear.) It was as natural as the sun rising in days past for tribal people, but is now almost a foreign thought or action creating a society with little integrity and even less honor. Hopefully that will change one day.
As the years went by and the lessons and dreams unfolded, I was taught a few lessons about Karma. (in other words cause and effect). In order to grow spiritually, one must let go of hate, and learn to love all things and all races equally. More importantly, in order to learn the consequences of your actions in one life time, you will be reborn your next life living in the situation you created for others. How can you understand how your actions have affected others if you don't have to walk in those shoes? An easy example: if you hated blacks your last life time & treated them as inferior, you are sure to be re-born as a black person this life time living in tough conditions, so you can experience (learn at a soul level) how your actions and emotions created the situation you are in. A balancing of the soul so to speak. People may not like reading this, but truth isn't always easy or kind. Imagine how I feel, having the memories and visions of my past life as a male warrior known for his honesty and courage, now living in a world with little integrity, next to nil honesty and almost zero sacrifice in a white ladies body? I was filled with self hate for my skin color until I went up to Standing Rock Indian Reservation in 1996, and stood on Chief Gall's grave feeling self pity of my now current situation. The rain began pouring down on me with lightening and thunder crashing down all around me. Suddenly, I "heard" an amazing insight. With my arms in the air praying to the directions I heard these words "How can you mourn for here you are dancing on your own grave. You are still the same person, with lighter skin, that is all!" With those words, I looked down at my arms and started to laugh realizing very little really has changed with me except for the outer shell, even then I am still very strong and tough regardless. My self pity instantly turned into a smile and with that I was able to return home as proud as can be. The God's are right!
As to my red hair, I've always hated since I was a child, my wise daughter Tessa reminded me, " mom, you were reborn with red hair as a reminder to continue walking the good red road, even in this lifetime," which I have despite how tough it really has been. Bless her heart for the comforting words.
Remember: Walk in Balance (in all aspects of your life) and feel with your soul, not your eyes.
(note: to be a warrior in any life time, one must have a deep sense of right and wrong, a very strong spine and faith and courage in the Creator to speak the words most don't like to hear.) It was as natural as the sun rising in days past for tribal people, but is now almost a foreign thought or action creating a society with little integrity and even less honor. Hopefully that will change one day.
Thursday, June 23, 2011
Surrounding Dark Spirits with Light and Love or Sometimes with War While in the Dream Time
Dear Everyone, I can't believe I'm going to write about this area of my dream time since it sounds truly crazy, but the reality is it is a very big part of what I do when I sleep and I don't expect many to understand. There is a lot that happens while you are sleeping, making it a truly vulnerable time for your spirit if you don't protect yourself. If I had to pinpoint the time, when I was tested to see if I could handle the task of dealing with demons, would probably be in 1984 or so, while living very remotely and alone, in a State Park house on Gold Bluffs Beach within Prairie Creek Redwoods State Park in northern California. I had just moved to this house on the beach without phones or power (except generators), an hour away from town in order to do an internship. I was initially terrified of my "aloneness" in nature having come originally from Studio City in Los Angeles. One of the first nights alone at this house, I "woke up" mentally to find I was being attacked by a very ugly and scary looking demon (remember my body was actually asleep). I knew I was fighting for my soul and I knew it wasn't going to win! I instantly surrounded myself in the light and love of GOD and refused to feel fear so I didn't feed its spirit. It tried everything to scare me and when it realized I wasn't going to lose the battle it dissipated. I instantly woke up physically and found I was covered in sweat and the entity was still there next to my bed. Again, I fought it mentally and spiritually and finally it disappeared once and for all. The experience was soooo shocking that I had to share it with my dear friend and Native American teacher at the time Jack Norton. After I told him what happened and the details, he told me I was being tested to see if I was mentally and emotionally strong enough to go on "a journey." He was amazed it happened to me (probably cause I'm now white) yet very excited cause he had heard of it in his Native tribe (Hupa) but had never actually met anyone that had gone through it. Well, he was right, that experience opened the doorway for me to have to confront many demons in the dream time, especially ones attacking people close to me. (It was also a test to see if I was strong enough to withstand the knowledge of what happened to me in my past life as a Plains warrior.)
Here's an example of one such dream: I wake up flying in a very dark place. There is a big black building nearby. Suddenly, a very ugly red demon appears and is obviously challenging me. My logical mind instantly thinks "oh hell no" but like a bull dog, my spirit without one ounce of fear or hesitation takes off after the demon like a banshee. I literally chase it out of the dimension we are in with a fury that amazes even me" The next day my dear friend at the time, Maryann calls me to say her young son Joseph had been having nightmares of a red demon attacking him in his sleep. I instantly drove over to their house and asked Joseph to draw a picture of the demon. I truly almost fainted when I saw that the demon was the exact same one I attacked the night before. Needless to say, little Joseph never had the nightmare again.
In another instance I dealt with the demons in a very different manner. This time: I wake up and I am standing on a stage in a very low frequency dimension with demonic type spirits in front of me surrounding the stage. I can't help but notice how truly ugly and scary they appear to the visual eye but I am not threatened by them. Suddenly, I lift both arms up with my all my fingers pointing to the crowd and brilliant white light starts shooting out of my fingers. As I spread the light over the entire crowd I look each in the eye and say "I love you unconditionally."Once the light was over all the spirits, suddenly my body while on stage, was engulfed in light itself and I began raising up towards the heavens. Then I woke up.
I've come to understand there are different types of beings in a low frequency. There are those that are very dangerous and walk in to people who open their own spirits up by dark destructive thoughts, alcohol/drug abuse, greed, incessant lying, etc and those souls that have become victims to themselves that don't harm others, but just need to know they are loved and deserve to be with GOD. I fight the dangerous ones with battle and give love to the others.
(Have you ever watched a family member or friend you care about completely change in personality and mannerisms and not understand what happened--becoming estranged? That is when they have been "walked into" by a negative force becoming someone they weren't before. Always mentally visualize yourself and loved ones, surrounded in love and light, especially before going to sleep.)
Namaste
Here's an example of one such dream: I wake up flying in a very dark place. There is a big black building nearby. Suddenly, a very ugly red demon appears and is obviously challenging me. My logical mind instantly thinks "oh hell no" but like a bull dog, my spirit without one ounce of fear or hesitation takes off after the demon like a banshee. I literally chase it out of the dimension we are in with a fury that amazes even me" The next day my dear friend at the time, Maryann calls me to say her young son Joseph had been having nightmares of a red demon attacking him in his sleep. I instantly drove over to their house and asked Joseph to draw a picture of the demon. I truly almost fainted when I saw that the demon was the exact same one I attacked the night before. Needless to say, little Joseph never had the nightmare again.
In another instance I dealt with the demons in a very different manner. This time: I wake up and I am standing on a stage in a very low frequency dimension with demonic type spirits in front of me surrounding the stage. I can't help but notice how truly ugly and scary they appear to the visual eye but I am not threatened by them. Suddenly, I lift both arms up with my all my fingers pointing to the crowd and brilliant white light starts shooting out of my fingers. As I spread the light over the entire crowd I look each in the eye and say "I love you unconditionally."Once the light was over all the spirits, suddenly my body while on stage, was engulfed in light itself and I began raising up towards the heavens. Then I woke up.
I've come to understand there are different types of beings in a low frequency. There are those that are very dangerous and walk in to people who open their own spirits up by dark destructive thoughts, alcohol/drug abuse, greed, incessant lying, etc and those souls that have become victims to themselves that don't harm others, but just need to know they are loved and deserve to be with GOD. I fight the dangerous ones with battle and give love to the others.
(Have you ever watched a family member or friend you care about completely change in personality and mannerisms and not understand what happened--becoming estranged? That is when they have been "walked into" by a negative force becoming someone they weren't before. Always mentally visualize yourself and loved ones, surrounded in love and light, especially before going to sleep.)
Namaste
Monday, June 20, 2011
Another aspect of my dream state - going to Heaven and to Hell
It's funny how I have taken the ability to travel to both Heaven and Hell for granted all these years assuming everyone else is doing the same thing. Now, after talking to many, I know that is not the case. I feel blessed to have experienced the Halls of God like I have, as well as helping guide souls out of Hell, which seems to be my soul's main purpose as is fighting demons (I'll explain later.) Since I spend so much time in both places, I have no fear of dying, since I all ready know what to expect. I'd like to first share my experience of going down into Hell and helping misguided souls up to the light, followed by my experience of floating through the Halls of God. All experiences have touched me beyond words.
"I’m riding in a white van full of hospital coworkers. The van is driving alongside a narrow, windy road going up the side of a steep mountain and there are no guardrails on the side of the road. I can see over the precipice a fall thousands of feet below. Oh my God, the van is loosing traction and begins sliding backwards. It plummets over the side of the cliff and I KNOW I’m going to die. I “wake up” moments later and find myself in a cold, damp dark cave I recognize as “Hell.” I don’t like it at all yet, somehow, I know I am here to help the others trapped down here. It is my job to show them the way out….to rise up toward the light, to the top of the tunnel. The souls down here don’t realize they have a choice to be down here or ascend to the heavens if they desire. They just don‘t know it. I suddenly understand about Hell; the knowledge being downloaded into my brain. God doesn’t send souls to hell, we send ourselves here. We create our own misery by lying, cheating, alcohol abuse, close mindedness, greed, control, fear, destroying the earth---anything that darkens the spirit during our lifetime experiences. God loves all of us and wants us to be in the light, so I was sent down here to help guide the way out for those that choose to follow. God's frequency is too high to be here and it takes souls like me that can lower or raise their frequencies to help. Telepathically, I transmit to the tormented souls to follow me. There are even children down here. I see a beautiful young blond girl around ten years old who comes with us. I keep rising higher and higher visualizing the sky and the light above. I finally leave the darkness of the cave into the warm and sunny daylight floating towards the pure white clouds high in the sky. I naturally float to the brightest of light and turn around to see a stream of souls following me out of Hell. I am very pleased. I float off to the side, allowing the souls to quietly pass me into the waiting light of the Great Spirit. I feel the Great Spirit is very pleased with me and I feel very loved."
I woke up divinely relaxed and deeply proud of myself because I knew I had done well.
Now, just months later, the Halls of God.
(Note - I have had numerous dreams with ethereal (angelic) music resonating in the background with glorious colors in the sky all around me, but in this dream, I was in the Halls of God. This one occurred while camping in Moab high upon a red sand stone cliff sleeping with my soul's other half.)
"I wake up to find myself silently floating down a beautiful hallway, with paintings covering the walls, such as Michelangelo's work in the Sistine Chapel. The colors and artwork are soooo astounding I can just gaze at amazement to what I am seeing. There is beautiful angelic music playing in the background filling my heart and soul with pure love. A female angel floats towards me and I can't help but try to reach my finger out to touch her. She gives me this "no, no" gesture with a smile upon her face and gracefully darts out of my way. A second angel appears and again I try futilely to touch her but again she doesn't want me too either, so I continue floating towards the end of this magnificent Hallway. When I get to the end I am perched high above, suspended in the air. I put my arms out to my sides and begin turning four times in a clockwise direction, as if I praying to the four directions. Then I hear these words coming from the Creator himself: "Everything is as it should be, but you will be going through Hell."
I abruptly woke up with this ominous warning in my thoughts, with the love still flowing through my heart yet wondering what it could mean. I had all ready experienced the spiritual Hell, but totally forgot about an earthly one. Little did I know that within a year and a half, I would be living through emotional & physical Hell itself. (Although, I knew there was a reason for it, it did not make it any easier and I wondered if I'd survive.)
"I’m riding in a white van full of hospital coworkers. The van is driving alongside a narrow, windy road going up the side of a steep mountain and there are no guardrails on the side of the road. I can see over the precipice a fall thousands of feet below. Oh my God, the van is loosing traction and begins sliding backwards. It plummets over the side of the cliff and I KNOW I’m going to die. I “wake up” moments later and find myself in a cold, damp dark cave I recognize as “Hell.” I don’t like it at all yet, somehow, I know I am here to help the others trapped down here. It is my job to show them the way out….to rise up toward the light, to the top of the tunnel. The souls down here don’t realize they have a choice to be down here or ascend to the heavens if they desire. They just don‘t know it. I suddenly understand about Hell; the knowledge being downloaded into my brain. God doesn’t send souls to hell, we send ourselves here. We create our own misery by lying, cheating, alcohol abuse, close mindedness, greed, control, fear, destroying the earth---anything that darkens the spirit during our lifetime experiences. God loves all of us and wants us to be in the light, so I was sent down here to help guide the way out for those that choose to follow. God's frequency is too high to be here and it takes souls like me that can lower or raise their frequencies to help. Telepathically, I transmit to the tormented souls to follow me. There are even children down here. I see a beautiful young blond girl around ten years old who comes with us. I keep rising higher and higher visualizing the sky and the light above. I finally leave the darkness of the cave into the warm and sunny daylight floating towards the pure white clouds high in the sky. I naturally float to the brightest of light and turn around to see a stream of souls following me out of Hell. I am very pleased. I float off to the side, allowing the souls to quietly pass me into the waiting light of the Great Spirit. I feel the Great Spirit is very pleased with me and I feel very loved."
I woke up divinely relaxed and deeply proud of myself because I knew I had done well.
Now, just months later, the Halls of God.
(Note - I have had numerous dreams with ethereal (angelic) music resonating in the background with glorious colors in the sky all around me, but in this dream, I was in the Halls of God. This one occurred while camping in Moab high upon a red sand stone cliff sleeping with my soul's other half.)
"I wake up to find myself silently floating down a beautiful hallway, with paintings covering the walls, such as Michelangelo's work in the Sistine Chapel. The colors and artwork are soooo astounding I can just gaze at amazement to what I am seeing. There is beautiful angelic music playing in the background filling my heart and soul with pure love. A female angel floats towards me and I can't help but try to reach my finger out to touch her. She gives me this "no, no" gesture with a smile upon her face and gracefully darts out of my way. A second angel appears and again I try futilely to touch her but again she doesn't want me too either, so I continue floating towards the end of this magnificent Hallway. When I get to the end I am perched high above, suspended in the air. I put my arms out to my sides and begin turning four times in a clockwise direction, as if I praying to the four directions. Then I hear these words coming from the Creator himself: "Everything is as it should be, but you will be going through Hell."
I abruptly woke up with this ominous warning in my thoughts, with the love still flowing through my heart yet wondering what it could mean. I had all ready experienced the spiritual Hell, but totally forgot about an earthly one. Little did I know that within a year and a half, I would be living through emotional & physical Hell itself. (Although, I knew there was a reason for it, it did not make it any easier and I wondered if I'd survive.)
Thursday, June 16, 2011
Lesson in judging Others - The Hawk Dream
Hello everyone. I thought it might be neat to share this dream I had years ago, about judging others. The insight was very humbling. I wish I were able to say I learned my lesson from it, but I am still human and catch myself still making the same "visual" mistakes on occasion despite my amazing experience. Here is what happened:
Moments after falling asleep, I came up and out of my body flying into the night sky. There is an elderly Native American women floating by my side. Suddenly, my spirit goes into the body of a huge redtail hawk. I instantly have the vision of the hawk and can feel my enormous wings off to the sides soaring in the night sky. I begin to semi-panic inside at the new experience not sure how it happened. I hear the elderly woman say to me "when you feel fear open your mouth and screech, releasing the fear from within," which I did, numerous times, entranced by the amazing sound emanating from my mouth. As I was soaring, suddenly "beings" from somewhere else come up alongside me and fly by as well which seemed very normal to me. Suddenly, these two very funny looking"beings" appear and my VERY first thoughts are "wow, they look really odd" and kind of chuckle to myself. Moments later, the elderly women scolds me with these words "How can you judge someone much wiser and more advanced than yourself based on their appearance?" My spirit was instantly taken out of the hawk and put back into my own sleeping body. I immediately woke up and opened my eyes, very disappointed in myself that I had "failed" my test. I was sorry I had disappointed the elder, mentally apologizing to her for my weakness and vowing I would do my best not to do it again in my waking state.
I will never forget her words & try to instill the same ideas to my children.
I have learned our eyes are our biggest handicap blinding us to see things as they really are! We should be feeling and judging with our hearts, not our eyes.
Moments after falling asleep, I came up and out of my body flying into the night sky. There is an elderly Native American women floating by my side. Suddenly, my spirit goes into the body of a huge redtail hawk. I instantly have the vision of the hawk and can feel my enormous wings off to the sides soaring in the night sky. I begin to semi-panic inside at the new experience not sure how it happened. I hear the elderly woman say to me "when you feel fear open your mouth and screech, releasing the fear from within," which I did, numerous times, entranced by the amazing sound emanating from my mouth. As I was soaring, suddenly "beings" from somewhere else come up alongside me and fly by as well which seemed very normal to me. Suddenly, these two very funny looking"beings" appear and my VERY first thoughts are "wow, they look really odd" and kind of chuckle to myself. Moments later, the elderly women scolds me with these words "How can you judge someone much wiser and more advanced than yourself based on their appearance?" My spirit was instantly taken out of the hawk and put back into my own sleeping body. I immediately woke up and opened my eyes, very disappointed in myself that I had "failed" my test. I was sorry I had disappointed the elder, mentally apologizing to her for my weakness and vowing I would do my best not to do it again in my waking state.
I will never forget her words & try to instill the same ideas to my children.
I have learned our eyes are our biggest handicap blinding us to see things as they really are! We should be feeling and judging with our hearts, not our eyes.
Sunday, June 12, 2011
Special message of the day from my friend Marlo Morgan
"Love is not an emotion, but a state of being."
Marlo Morgan (author of my favorite all time book Mutant Message Down Under for its' simple truths)
(These are her words she spoke to me just five minutes ago on the phone to share with everyone.)
After I read Mutant Message many years ago, I spent days walking alone in the wilderness thinking about the wisdom of the Aborigines and incorporated it into my life which I'm sure helped on my walk of the "good red road" that lead to my past life dreams, (esp. the part about why Mutants are not telepathic.) Truth jumps out at those that are ready to see it.
Happy Sunday to all.
Namaste.
Kerrie
Marlo Morgan (author of my favorite all time book Mutant Message Down Under for its' simple truths)
(These are her words she spoke to me just five minutes ago on the phone to share with everyone.)
After I read Mutant Message many years ago, I spent days walking alone in the wilderness thinking about the wisdom of the Aborigines and incorporated it into my life which I'm sure helped on my walk of the "good red road" that lead to my past life dreams, (esp. the part about why Mutants are not telepathic.) Truth jumps out at those that are ready to see it.
Happy Sunday to all.
Namaste.
Kerrie
Friday, June 10, 2011
Flying or rather "astral projecting" in a dream state
I'd like to share my experiences with astral projecting or rather the sensation of flying in my dreams. This is another aspect of my dreaming that I have experienced for years. Back in 1987, while living with my then boyfriend at Freshwater County Park, I began to come up and out of my body while I slept at night, hovering over us both & thinking "wow this is cool." I was completely "awake" mentally and aware of my surroundings. I'd often fly through the ceiling of our house and fly in the night time clouds, tripping on the feeling of the wind currents and how free I felt. In the mornings, I kept telling my boyfriend what I was experiencing & he kept saying it was impossible. He told me one day, that if I could consciously count backwards from 10, while up in the sky he would maybe believe me. That very night I came up & out of my body, into the night sky & yelled down to Vern below "watch me, (while counting my fingers) 10, 9, 8, 7, & so on to 0. " "I told you I was awake." I have been astral projecting ever since.
I would like to share that during the process of astral projecting I have experienced phases of acceptance and reality. In the beginning, I would get trapped in houses, not sure how to get through the doors and windows since my eyes believed a solid object should stop me, limiting my flying experiences. As time went on and I was guided through my experiences from the Native elders, I eventually learned that in the dream state, if you just imagine your spirit as "fluid" you can fly right through anything. Now, after years of practice, I can consciously choose where I want to fly or visit, with houses and buildings only a practice obstacle for altering my sense of reality.
In fact, a few short months ago, I became too relaxed in one of my experiences and was berated for my actions. Here is the dream: I had decided to fly over to the Pacific Northwest to the redwoods to be near my best friend Carla, if only in my sleep. After flying over the mountain ranges and reaching the coast, I noticed how the sky over the ocean was dark and totally dramatic in appearance yet mesmerizing and beautiful. I closed my eyes in total serenity while embracing the flying feeling now out over the ocean. Suddenly, there was a tugging on my right leg, holding me back, pulling me down. I tried to shake the entity off that was holding my leg, to no avail. I began to get very annoyed and turned around to see what had my leg. Much to my shock, there holding on firmly was an OLD Australian aboriginal man with eyes boring in to my soul. At his side, was his old wife. He was obviously angry at me and said to me "if I hadn't pulled you back, you would have died. You of all people should know better and need to be more aware. It isn't your time to die!"
I was so ashamed to have upset him, but so honored at the same time to know he too was watching over me. I realized I must pay better attention even in a dream state. I was sorry to have disappointed the wise one. I hope I get another chance to repent, so to speak.
To each of you, I hope you experience the feeling of flying in your dreams and maybe become more conscious of the experience guiding you to further lessons.
Have a wonderful Friday.
Kerrie
I would like to share that during the process of astral projecting I have experienced phases of acceptance and reality. In the beginning, I would get trapped in houses, not sure how to get through the doors and windows since my eyes believed a solid object should stop me, limiting my flying experiences. As time went on and I was guided through my experiences from the Native elders, I eventually learned that in the dream state, if you just imagine your spirit as "fluid" you can fly right through anything. Now, after years of practice, I can consciously choose where I want to fly or visit, with houses and buildings only a practice obstacle for altering my sense of reality.
In fact, a few short months ago, I became too relaxed in one of my experiences and was berated for my actions. Here is the dream: I had decided to fly over to the Pacific Northwest to the redwoods to be near my best friend Carla, if only in my sleep. After flying over the mountain ranges and reaching the coast, I noticed how the sky over the ocean was dark and totally dramatic in appearance yet mesmerizing and beautiful. I closed my eyes in total serenity while embracing the flying feeling now out over the ocean. Suddenly, there was a tugging on my right leg, holding me back, pulling me down. I tried to shake the entity off that was holding my leg, to no avail. I began to get very annoyed and turned around to see what had my leg. Much to my shock, there holding on firmly was an OLD Australian aboriginal man with eyes boring in to my soul. At his side, was his old wife. He was obviously angry at me and said to me "if I hadn't pulled you back, you would have died. You of all people should know better and need to be more aware. It isn't your time to die!"
I was so ashamed to have upset him, but so honored at the same time to know he too was watching over me. I realized I must pay better attention even in a dream state. I was sorry to have disappointed the wise one. I hope I get another chance to repent, so to speak.
To each of you, I hope you experience the feeling of flying in your dreams and maybe become more conscious of the experience guiding you to further lessons.
Have a wonderful Friday.
Kerrie
Thursday, June 9, 2011
A Divine message I received approximately nine years ago in a night time dream (not Native American related but still a Divine Message)
Hello everyone,
As the days churn on, each one with a new weather catastrophe upon us, I thought it might be worth sharing one of the most powerful "Divine" messages I have ever received in a dream. Upon wakening, I was numb inside for hours, reliving the messages and images I witnessed not sure what to do with such an ominous warning . Here is why: (Please remember my body is asleep, but my mind "wakes"up)
"I open my eyes to see I am sitting on an old stone foundation knowing I am in Israel. I am sitting by myself looking all around taking in the ancientness of the area, when I suddenly realize or rather "feel" I am in the presence of GOD. I begin to look up into the sky and as I do the once beautiful blue sky begins to turn really dark and foreboding with lightening bolts crashing all around me. Somehow I know I am not supposed to witness what GOD is about to do so I close my eyes and put my hands in prayer fashion. Outside of my closed eyelids I SEE huge bright blasts going on all around me. Somehow, I know I am totally safe and then come these words from GOD "ALL I'VE EVER WANTED WAS FOR MAN TO UNCONDITIONALLY LOVE EACH OTHER, NATURE AND THE BEASTS. IT WAS ALL SO SIMPLE, IT WAS ALL SO SIMPLE!" But, it is the utter devastation in his heart that permeates into my soul devastating me as well. The disappointment in his voice makes me ashamed to be a part of the human race that has done nothing but destroy the earth and all its creatures. After the explosions end, I slowly open my eyes not sure what to expect. With a broken heart, I get up off the ancient foundation (I later learn was King Solomon's Temple) and begin walking through the streets of Jerusalem. Every one is gone but me."
As the days churn on, each one with a new weather catastrophe upon us, I thought it might be worth sharing one of the most powerful "Divine" messages I have ever received in a dream. Upon wakening, I was numb inside for hours, reliving the messages and images I witnessed not sure what to do with such an ominous warning . Here is why: (Please remember my body is asleep, but my mind "wakes"up)
"I open my eyes to see I am sitting on an old stone foundation knowing I am in Israel. I am sitting by myself looking all around taking in the ancientness of the area, when I suddenly realize or rather "feel" I am in the presence of GOD. I begin to look up into the sky and as I do the once beautiful blue sky begins to turn really dark and foreboding with lightening bolts crashing all around me. Somehow I know I am not supposed to witness what GOD is about to do so I close my eyes and put my hands in prayer fashion. Outside of my closed eyelids I SEE huge bright blasts going on all around me. Somehow, I know I am totally safe and then come these words from GOD "ALL I'VE EVER WANTED WAS FOR MAN TO UNCONDITIONALLY LOVE EACH OTHER, NATURE AND THE BEASTS. IT WAS ALL SO SIMPLE, IT WAS ALL SO SIMPLE!" But, it is the utter devastation in his heart that permeates into my soul devastating me as well. The disappointment in his voice makes me ashamed to be a part of the human race that has done nothing but destroy the earth and all its creatures. After the explosions end, I slowly open my eyes not sure what to expect. With a broken heart, I get up off the ancient foundation (I later learn was King Solomon's Temple) and begin walking through the streets of Jerusalem. Every one is gone but me."
Tuesday, June 7, 2011
My first dream introducing the grizzly as my totem...
It's a funny thing how bears have made their presence in my life, even as a teen when my family went white water rafting on the Klamath River. As we slept on its banks, I was woken up by the sound of sniffing next to my head. When I slowly and dreadingly opened my eyes there was a black bear standing right next to me smelling my dirty hair. To say I was terrified is an understatement. Fortunately, no one was hurt and hours later saw the bear in the day, with a cub by its' side, presenting to me- my totem. Again, years later while living in Curry Village in Yosemite, I was on a pay phone on the outside of the reservation building talking to a friend, at the same time watching a big black bear approximately 50 feet away eating out of the trash can. Just that quick, the bear dropped down on all fours and decided I had something it wanted and promptly chased me into the building stopping its charge at the doorway. The manager on duty yelled at me for running from the bear (easy for him to say, since he had never been chased by a charging bear), yet ironically his advice probably saved my life years later while hiking in the Tetons. This time a friend and I were hiking high up in the canyons in a grassy area with a small creek running through it. (I put the detailed story in my book) This time it was a grizzly that confronted us, and instead of running, I stood up to the huge bear, screaming and yelling, yet admiring its amazing beauty. I have never forgotten the comical look it had on its face, like "what did I do? Why is she yelling at me" I was not ready to be its lunch and wanted it to know that. Needless to say, I was never so humbled in my life and will forever cherish the moment. And again, years later while living in the redwood state parks, I was constantly fighting with the bears to leave my deer hides alone, as well as helping rescue them out of the parks, so they wouldn't be put down.
But bears have not only been in my physical life, but appear in my dreams as well, protecting me and "waking me up to the spirit world. Demanding it really!"
Here is the first dream introducing the grizzly as my totem.
"I am sitting at Lake Earl, alongside a pond with Tessa at my side trying to figure out how to make an Indian flute. I am quietly wondering what type of wood I should use. I look inside a book that suddenly appears on my lap and then at the ground in reflection. There at my feet is the beginning of my flute on a branch in front of me. The body of the flute is still a branch, but the branch has been whittled into the body of a beautiful flute. As I sit wondering how this happened a shadow catches my eye. I look up to see a big grizzly bear lumbering down the hill towards us. The bear keeps coming so I grab Tessa up into my arms and wade into the near by pond thinking the bear won’t follow us there. I keep going deeper and deeper yet the bear is now swimming straight towards us. I try to swim away but it’s no use. The bear is swimming too fast. I’m sure it is over for Tessa and myself. Right as the bear reaches us the brown monster disappears under the water. Suddenly, right in front of us appears a red-headed girl where the bear had submerged. It was at that moment I realized the bear was a part of my spirit and the grizzly was my totem, my protector."
I woke up and reflected upon my profound dream. I had read enough about the local Indian tribes and their beliefs to know this dream had shown to me, my powerful animal totem, the grizzly bear!
Dream well and pay attention to those that present themselves to you!
But bears have not only been in my physical life, but appear in my dreams as well, protecting me and "waking me up to the spirit world. Demanding it really!"
Here is the first dream introducing the grizzly as my totem.
"I am sitting at Lake Earl, alongside a pond with Tessa at my side trying to figure out how to make an Indian flute. I am quietly wondering what type of wood I should use. I look inside a book that suddenly appears on my lap and then at the ground in reflection. There at my feet is the beginning of my flute on a branch in front of me. The body of the flute is still a branch, but the branch has been whittled into the body of a beautiful flute. As I sit wondering how this happened a shadow catches my eye. I look up to see a big grizzly bear lumbering down the hill towards us. The bear keeps coming so I grab Tessa up into my arms and wade into the near by pond thinking the bear won’t follow us there. I keep going deeper and deeper yet the bear is now swimming straight towards us. I try to swim away but it’s no use. The bear is swimming too fast. I’m sure it is over for Tessa and myself. Right as the bear reaches us the brown monster disappears under the water. Suddenly, right in front of us appears a red-headed girl where the bear had submerged. It was at that moment I realized the bear was a part of my spirit and the grizzly was my totem, my protector."
I woke up and reflected upon my profound dream. I had read enough about the local Indian tribes and their beliefs to know this dream had shown to me, my powerful animal totem, the grizzly bear!
Dream well and pay attention to those that present themselves to you!
This one soon followed the first one
"I walk out of a dark building into the brilliant sunlight. It takes a moment for my stunned eyes to focus because of the brightness of the day. As my vision begins to clear, I am startled to see a beautiful black horse standing right in front of me with a powerful male Plains Indian warrior upon his back wearing a headdress full of eagle feathers hanging down at his side. The Indian"s shirt is decorated with beautifully beaded colored designs and he is wearing worn moccasins on his feet. His hair goes down to the center of his back. His face shows no emotion yet his eyes seem to be staring into my soul. I can not stop staring back. Out of my peripheral vision too mesmerized to look away, I see Coulter and his father standing off to the right of the horse. I ponder the stark contrast of the warrior and my husband in how they dress and in who they are. My soul remains loyal to the Indian. I walk up to the warrior and stand before him."
I woke up startled at the clarity of my dream and just laid quietly wondering what it meant.
I woke up startled at the clarity of my dream and just laid quietly wondering what it meant.
My first dream introducing Native American elders
"I walk into a large, barren room with nothing on the walls. At the front sits a large fold up table with six Indian elders sitting around it. The elders are comprised of three men and three women. They turn to look at me as I slowly approach them. Their faces are expressionless and I continue moving as if in a trance. Out of nowhere, in front of me on the wall, a large United States flag appears, as does a large bald eagle feather on the right. Without any thought or emotion I move slowly and without doubt to the eagle feather. I reach out for the feather and stoically hold it in my hand at the same time proudly displaying it to the elders. No words are spoken between us, but I could tell they were pleased. My soul allegiances were proven."
I woke up in bed with this clear dream in my mind not understanding its significance and wondering whom these Indian elders were. They seemed so familiar to me yet how could that be possible?
I woke up in bed with this clear dream in my mind not understanding its significance and wondering whom these Indian elders were. They seemed so familiar to me yet how could that be possible?
A spiritual death, not a physical one
A spiritual death, not a physical one: "06/03/2011
A dear friend wrote to me today regarding my dream posted below thinking I was preoccupied with physically dying. I'd like to say that although I really appreciate her insight, I don't believe it was about physically dying, but rather spiritually dying and being reborn into a higher state of awareness. I have seen my self die numerous times in my dreams, and after learning about the native ways, understand one must die, to be reborn. In the old days, that would have been celebrated as someone's birthday.
A dear friend wrote to me today regarding my dream posted below thinking I was preoccupied with physically dying. I'd like to say that although I really appreciate her insight, I don't believe it was about physically dying, but rather spiritually dying and being reborn into a higher state of awareness. I have seen my self die numerous times in my dreams, and after learning about the native ways, understand one must die, to be reborn. In the old days, that would have been celebrated as someone's birthday.
Friday, June 3, 2011
Powerful nighttime dream I have that I will share with everyone interested
Today is June 3rd, 2011, and I will begin using this blog to post the powerful dreams I have in the night. They are intense & spiritually guiding and honestly I'm not quite sure why I am so honored to have them. (maybe it is my warrior spirit-smile) Before I tell you about this particular dream, let me tell you what occurred before going to sleep. I found myself really questioning my decision to go public with the journey I have experienced ( i.e. my book) knowing the grief I will receive by many & the ostracization of others (despite being told by so many to write.) . I went outside & stood under the stars with my arms up to the heavens looking up into the star filled night asking for strength & understanding. I thanked all the Native elders & warriors in the dreamtime for what they have shown me, but then asked them why if people (even Native Americans) are going to have such a hard time with what I revealed. What's the point? After a few minutes of silence & humility I thanked them, with my usual "Wakan Tanka (Great Spirit) Pilamayaaye (thank you) -hanhepi waste (good night)"and went inside to go to sleep. In the late of night, this is what I dreamed.
"I am in a hotel room with very high ceilings. My husband is sitting on a strange tiny little shelf high above & my son standing in the corner. I am standing on the top of a dresser. In front of me is a HUGE grizzly bear - angry at me. He lunges at me, growling at the same time. I'm not afraid initially for I see him all the time, but this time he grabs my arm with his teeth and holds it for a moment. Then the realization that I'm about to die goes through my head. I could tell my husband was very afraid, so I leaned my head around the bear to say "don't worry honey, I am happy. This is a good death. It is the way I've wanted to die all along anyway." The bear lets my arm go and I can't believe how big his head is. I look down in a non-threatening manner out of the gaze of his eyes & the bear slowly walks away. I climbed up onto something taller and the bear turns back to me trying to reach me once again. The bear and I stare at one another and then he leaves."
Wow, what a powerful reminder to me to not care what anyone thinks or believes of my story. I have the fierce grizzly as my totem & warriors on the other side with me all the time regardless of the world around me. Nothing can change that! I need to have faith in them and my self. When I woke up, I walked over to the powerful pouch I made, with a fossilized bear tooth I found the day after a powerful bear dream, a bear claw from a bear I skinned while (5) months pregnant with my son & deer toes on a piece of brain tanned hide I had tanned yrs prior & put it proudly around my neck. My soul is a native warrior and I will never question that again. The bear reminded me of that. Kerrie
"I am in a hotel room with very high ceilings. My husband is sitting on a strange tiny little shelf high above & my son standing in the corner. I am standing on the top of a dresser. In front of me is a HUGE grizzly bear - angry at me. He lunges at me, growling at the same time. I'm not afraid initially for I see him all the time, but this time he grabs my arm with his teeth and holds it for a moment. Then the realization that I'm about to die goes through my head. I could tell my husband was very afraid, so I leaned my head around the bear to say "don't worry honey, I am happy. This is a good death. It is the way I've wanted to die all along anyway." The bear lets my arm go and I can't believe how big his head is. I look down in a non-threatening manner out of the gaze of his eyes & the bear slowly walks away. I climbed up onto something taller and the bear turns back to me trying to reach me once again. The bear and I stare at one another and then he leaves."
Wow, what a powerful reminder to me to not care what anyone thinks or believes of my story. I have the fierce grizzly as my totem & warriors on the other side with me all the time regardless of the world around me. Nothing can change that! I need to have faith in them and my self. When I woke up, I walked over to the powerful pouch I made, with a fossilized bear tooth I found the day after a powerful bear dream, a bear claw from a bear I skinned while (5) months pregnant with my son & deer toes on a piece of brain tanned hide I had tanned yrs prior & put it proudly around my neck. My soul is a native warrior and I will never question that again. The bear reminded me of that. Kerrie
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